I am so smrt

I managed to do the following incredibly stupid things my first week as a candidate in a Doctor of Philosophy program:
-Open a zip file attachment to an email which infected my computer with a virus nothing can get rid of
-Throw my keys in a rather large dumpster
-Come to school in a pair a pants with a huge whole in the crotch (while wearing red underpants)
Hopefully my brain decides to turn on next week.